Top 5 reasons NOT to be in Helsinki during the Zombie apocalypse

In my last post I told you why it would be a good idea to be in Helsinki should the dead start rising from their graves. There are however plenty of reasons NOT to be in Helsinki

5. Low population density

Helsinki (and also Finland in general) is pretty loosely populated. According to Wikipedia, Helsinki is ranked 60th out of 97 capitals ranked by population density. While this would also be a good thing if the dead should rise, because there would be fewer of them, it also means that help is harder to come by and after the initial looting has died down, you will have long distances to travel to the next viable place of looting.

4. Finns are uncommunicative

There’s a long-running joke about how finns talk so little. During a zombie apocalypse this can be a real life-threatening detriment since you can never be certain whether or not your companions are only answering with grunts because they have turned (or are about to) or if it’s just because they’re finnish.

3. Too light in the summer

Even in Helsinki, which is among the southernmost cities in Finland the sun hardly goes down around the summer solstice or “juhannus” as we call it. Or rather, dusk begins before twilight has completely faded for a couple of months in the summer. Needless to say, this can really cramp your style, if you’re trying to take advantage of the fact that humans have truly inferior vision and therefore zombies must as well.

2. Too dark in the winter

Helsinki is located on the 60th northern latitude line which is located just roughly 720 kilometers or 447 miles from the arctic circle. This in turn means that in the winter, just around the winter solstice the sun barely makes it up at all and starting around October or November many people start feeling the effects of SAD (Seasonal Affective Disorder) and many suffer from it all the way through to February. SAD usually presents as depression and general tiredness. That kind of thing can really diminish not only your skills to survive, but your will to survive as well.

1. IT’S FREAKING COLD!

I’ll admit, this has been an unusually cold winter. Right now we’re going fast toward the summer but during this last winter (and the one before it) temperatures like -20°Celsius (that’s -4°Fahrenheit) and unless you’re properly dressed, you’ll have frostbite in 30 minutes outside. Needless to say, that’s a huge detriment if your significant other should turn right when you’re snuggled up to watch tv together. Running out of the apartment without having at least ten minutes to dress yourself could result in you dying anyway, very painfully since frostbite is no picnic either.

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